It’s always interesting when an actor or TV personality announce that they are ‘having a go’ at stand-up. I have seen a few over the years and from Richard Bacon (frankly embarrassing) to Kirsten O’Brien (genuinely likable) the results have definitely been mixed. The latest in this line of actors in clown’s clothing is Emily Atack. Most famous for her stint in ‘I’m a Celebrity…’ and her role as Charlotte Hinchcliffe in The Inbetweeners – a one-dimensional character that I felt Emily actually bought more heart to than the writers ever intended.

Heading down to the Clapham Grand and passing a D-lister in the queue made me reminisce about club nights here in the 2000s. It was a faded venue then and has not aged well. I picked up my tickets (with after show party pass, dah-ling) and if I hadn’t guessed by this stage that this would not be a standard comedy show then the blasting Girl Power soundtrack and drinks served in white plastic wine glasses certainly confirmed it.

Emily arrived in confident fashion, literally rolling on to the stage. During the opening monologue she told us how this whole tour was actually the result of a terrible idea on a very drunken night out – a theme that remained throughout the show – and she scored easy early wins with jokes about milking The Inbetweeners gravy train and her pals on I’m a Celebrity – in fact her biggest laugh on the night actually came from a Tweet by fellow Jungle resident and ‘Chaser’ Anne Hegerty who was banned from twitter for calling someone who criticised our Emily’s looks on that same platform a ‘sad little c***‘ .

It was at this point that it hit me… this was NOT a stand-up show at all. There were no jokes, no thought-provoking insights and no well-crafted routines. This was a ‘An Audience With…’ night that had been concealed as a stand-up show for a reason that I just cannot fathom. If you were expecting this actress to actually provide well-crafted comic insights in to her world and to attempt raw comedy material then you are going to be sorely disappointed.

Luckily for Emily this wasn’t what this audience craved. They were happy listening to her talk about getting battered, her boobs, boys and not worrying about what people think of her body.

I was sat in one of the three full-width rows of free reserved seating (using the Kevin Hart definition of ‘selling out’ I see) and was actually shocked to have the people around me just chatting to themselves and ignoring the show, they didn’t care about the performer – they had a bottle of Prosecco in each half and had ticked their social media quota for the night just by being there. I was even more shocked when these very same people all rose instantly at the close of the show to force a standing ovation!

The truth is that I think Emily Atack is a good actress who I hope to see on our screens more in the future, but this was not a good show. And when you start your set half an hour later than billed and throw in an extended interval people are really not getting their money’s worth at £20 a ticket.

This is London and there is stiff comedy competition out there. The Soho Theatre has Larry Dean at £13 a ticket and 2Northdown will soon be featuring clown legend Rob Newman for just £5 a pop. I guess that what I am trying to say is that if you want actual comedy then please go elsewhere. If, however, you just want Emily Atack and all of the faux celeb circus that goes with that then this may well be the show for you.

Clown Stars: **

 @Clapham Grand – London